The First of Many Letters to My Hammie

Dearest Hammie,

Just so you know, you got your moniker because your momma is a terrible liar.  Some see it as a flaw but you should see it has a guaranty that your momma will always tell you the truth. It all started because I was supposed to race your daddy in the annual Duluth Marathon.  Luckily, I had a nagging feeling that I would be expecting you so I didn’t register for the race.  Daddy and I were planning on racing auntie T and Grandpa K but now we had to think of a way to tell them that I wouldn’t be racing.  Your daddy decided that it would be best to say momma had pulled a hamstring.

You see, I knew it would be hard to get that one past Grandma K.  She would have all kinds of questions and concerns.  And my smile couldn’t hide from any of them.  As soon as the “official story” had come out of my mouth, she wanted to know the unofficial story. Over the course of the weekend, I fielded a plethora of scarcastic “how’s the hammie?” questions and jokes.  Your auntie T may have noticed but never let on.

Daddy and I decided that we liked the nickname and continue to call you Hammie.  You are my cooking hammie, who will stay nice and toasty until you are fully cooked.

Love Always!

Your Momma

Burn

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